When is it time to step in and assist your aging parents? That is an important question that many of us in the sandwich generation struggle with. Particularly for our elders that survived the Great Depression, intrusion and help from their adult children is strongly resisted. I’ve always assumed that this is because they are survivors, they are fiercely independent, and they definitely don’t need “help”.
I believe that it is safe to assume that the moment you begin worrying about your aging parents is likely the time that more analysis of the situation should start. The most common signs are that your parents are driving and this scares the living daylights out of you. It also could be that they have lots of expired food in the refrigerator or that they simply aren’t up to par with their usual impeccable housekeeping or hygiene. In the process of running our senior care service in Cincinnati, we see the same story over and over. That story always involves an elderly person who will look you in the eye and state, “I don’t need any help!”
If you find yourself in the situation where you are worrying about your parents or in-laws but constantly running up against roadblocks of resistance from the very folks you are trying to assist, just know that you are not alone. Aside from that realization, your best bet is to begin gently pointing out how little initiatives can greatly prolong the time one can spend happy and healthy in their own home. A personal emergency response system is a great place to start. Next comes assistance from family, friends, neighbors, or a reputable home care agency. Just don’t hesitate to reach out and ask for help. There are senior care professionals in every community that will be happy to discuss strategies for getting seniors to accept assistance and services galore that will make life easier.
